Permission to fuck Taylor Swift granted.

November 5, 2011

So last night, I asked Belle an admittedly loaded question. I wanted to know if she currently had a “thing” for any celebrities. I have asked her this in the past and the answer was always boring. She always told me that celebrities did nothing for her and aside from when she was in grade school, she didn’t really have any crushes. This is right in line with her claims to having no fantasies. The fact that she answered differently this time suggests that she might be opening up a bit. So which celebrities currently catch her eye? There were three. None of which were surprising to me. I’m actually not inclined to say who they are. That isn’t really my place and this particular blog isn’t about them. 🙂

So what was loaded about my question? I really wanted to write a blog about my new found fascination of Taylor Swift and I wanted to test the waters and make sure it wouldn’t piss her off. Lusting over another woman is not a very obedient thing to do, regardless of the likelihood of it ever happening. I informed her of this and she laughed. She told me that if I ever had a chance to fuck Taylor Swift to go for it. It isn’t as simple as that of course…more on that later. That did give me the permission I was looking for to write out what I wanted to say however, so here it is.

I hate country music. I have for quite some time. I am more of a classic rock guy and I hate the twangy, whining, hillbilly crap that Nashville puts out these days. The only country singer I have ever liked is Garth Brooks. I have found that it is pretty common for people to hate country but like Garth Brooks.

Since I started to learn to play guitar, my taste in music has broadened. It started with Sugarland. I could stand Sugarland because I felt it was more pop than country. At least their most recent album. A lot less twang and therefore I could listen to it. [note: I also have a bit of a thing for Jennifer Nettles although Belle says she is an ugly skank. I think Belle is insane] This ended up progressing into a love of Taylor Swift. A lot of her songs are easy to play for a beginner, and face it, they are just fun.

So I made an exception. I can like certain country music as long as it doesn’t sound like country music and it is being performed by hot women with sexy voices.

So that is the background. What is this post really about?

When I was young, before porn was readily available to me, I had celebrity crushes and I would masturbate to pictures/videos of them. I think that is fairly normal although when I asked Belle about this, she said that it wasn’t this way for her. My first crush was Winona Ryder. I wore her twice-my-age-ass out! Later in life, I pretty much stopped this practice altogether because of porn. Pornography had desensitized me enough to where I couldn’t get off just looking at pictures of attractive women, even if they were in seductive poses wearing sleazy clothing. It just wasn’t enough.

Enter male chastity. Now I am fairly certain I could get off looking at 1940’s propaganda posters without much effort. Problem is, I’m not allowed to masturbate. I really want to. I will see a really hot picture of Taylor and think “oh yeah, I’m definitely going to use that one.” Then as the erection starts to form, it is abruptly stopped and I am reminded that it isn’t going to happen.

Belle did tell me last night that maybe she will let me out sometime and let me have some private time in the bathroom. That is a fun thought. You know what might be a better thought though? Belle using this new found information to tease the hell out of me.

So do I fantasize about fucking the hell out of this hot young starlet? No I don’t. I can’t. My brain won’t let me. Thoroughly confused? Don’t worry, I’ll be explaining in my next post.


PS. Taylor, please don’t sue me.


  1. Masturbating to videos? Shoot, when I was young, there weren’t any videos…or any cable TV for that matter. LOL, getting *color* TV was a Big Deal. I had to make do with the brassiere advertisements in the Sears & Roebuck’s catalog.

    My wife/Keyholder/Mistress is rather jealous. I doubt I would get a ‘go ahead’ like that even for an ‘unattainable’ (normally) figure…

    • I’m sure it would be a different story if it actually happened. 😉 I’m not that kind of person anyway.

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