A Glimpse of My Fantasy.

Have I gotten to meet my new Domme yet? Not quite. My wife and I had quite the session last night and after, when asked if that was Belle or my wife, she simply replied, “A little of both.”

I had gone to bed, being on the early shift, I have to force myself sometimes. I couldn’t sleep. So I was lying in bed, texting my wife who was in the living room rocking our youngest to sleep. I was asking her about Belle and we were figuring out some specifics. At one point she asked what I was hoping for from Belle. I rattled off a short list of some of the acts that I had been fantasizing about and she thanked me for the suggestions. By this point, I was really wanting some riding crop action. More than I have ever craved it before. I relayed this and she agreed.

I retrieved the crop and she led me to the living room. It was a bit akward at first, but in no time I was without pants, and on my hands and knees. It was quite cold in there and that had to account for at least some of my shaking.

I got about a dozen swats on the ass before she started running the crop between my legs. This is what I was hoping for. I had been out of the device for several hours due to a little pain but I was over that and hard as a rock.

Please tell me to lie on my back! Please tell me to lie on my back!

“Lie down on your back.”

Yes!

I quickly abliged and my shaking increased. A couple of light swats on my legs led to some hesitation. I could tell what she wanted and it was exactly what I wanted. I dared to ask her.

“You want to don’t you?”

“Yes.”

“Then do it.”

I recieved several light swats to my balls. It didn’t hurt and only made me want more. I got more. Harder. It stung, but I loved it! My cock was next. God it felt so good!

She then grabbed my cock with her hand and gave it several hard strokes. The precum oozing from the tip was gathered and placed in my mouth. I quickly sucked it off her finger. I’ve turned in to quite the cum slut. 🙂

“Do you want more?”

“Yes.”

“What do you want?”

“More.”

“More what?”

“More cum.”

“Who’s cum.”

“My cum.”

She jerked me And once again I got to suck my salty fluid from her fingers.

Before I knew it, my entire cock was in her mouth. Not having had a blow job in a while, I was set to enjoy. Instead of sucking me, she sank her teeth into my cock near the base. Holy shit! She moved up a short distance and bit me again. Moved up some more and again until her lips were wrapped around the head of my penis. One more bite! I could barely take it, but I would have gladly taken it again and again.

“I’m going to fuck you now.”

No argument from me!

She removed her panties and straddled me. By this time my cock was so hard that much of the sensitivity was gone. This didn’t stop her pleasure. It felt so good to be inside her warm pussy. I was relaxed and enjoying the sensation when I got slapped across the face hard! I couldn’t believe it! She had done that to me before but never with that intensity.

She rode me for quite a while, making me tell her my fantasies. She stopped me briefly and held my mouth open so she could spit in it. So fucking hot!

Before long she came. From my end it didn’t seem to be earth shattering, but if I have learned anything, any orgasm is to be cherished.

She collapsed on me briefly and we cuddled. As she got up to get ready for bed, she looked me in the eye.

“We can do this.”

She smiled.

“Well we knew you could do this. I meant I think I can too.”

Re-inventing Belle

As Jnuts noted in the previous blog, I am going to try to meet him half way in his desire to dabble in a D/S relationship.  Those of you who have read some of earlier blogs will understand why this is a difficult thing for me.  I struggle with the power that MC gives me, so being the Domme in our relationship is a huge step.    I used my Fetlife profile to establish a persona for Belle……

I am Belle, the alter ego of a very vanilla, white collar professional turned SAHM. She is uncomfortable addressing some of her husbands more kinky desires, and that is where I step in. She was struggling with his desire to be locked in chastity and denied. She felt bad telling him no and teasing then denying. I do not. I don’t have the hang ups of past relationships that messed with her head. He wants smacked around a little while wearing a dog collar? I am game. He wants pissed on while I shower? Sure, won’t hurt me at all. It will be about me when I want it to be, not when she thinks it should be. I am not into receiving pain, but I can and will dish it out. He always said he wanted her to be the bitch she was at work in the bedroom. Well I am here now. Let’s hope he realized what he was wishing for.

Jnuts has not met Belle yet, but he has received several messages from her, and will be meeting her soon.

Belle

 

 

a real life break?

Real life has a way of really messing with your fun.  Jnuts and I had been having some issues, mostly focused around what I have begun referring to as the “chastity circle”.  I don’t play enough and keep him interested and worked up, he doesn’t help me out around the house more because he isn’t in the heightened state, therefore I don’t play, ect.  It is a tough one to break, but because we both were invested in MC and want to see it work for us, we decided we had to.

I have been against chastity contracts since we began investigating MC.  To me it makes it seem like our sex life is a business arrangement, but now I see the need to have needs and expectations in a written format.  I pledged to have at least 2 play sessions per week.  This may not seem like much to many of you, but given our lives it is going to take some work some weeks.  At this point that is the end of the agreement.  We both feel that this will break the cycle that we are currently in, and take us back to the point where we both saw the  benefits of MC.

That was last week…..Jnuts was locked and things appeared to be improving.  Then something very strange happened.  His step brother, whom we have very little contact with but is extremely close with his step dad and mom, was arrested and admitted to sexually abusing his 14 year old daughter multiple times.  The whole family is turned upside down, we are contacting people multiple times a day due to risk of hurting themselves over this, and we are all pretty  much in shock.  Last night when Jnuts came home from work, he asked to be unlocked.  He said he felt “dirty” wearing the device and anything having to do with sex.  I quickly agreed, because to be honest I felt the same way.  Pretty sad how someone who you are not close with yet tied to can change your personal life so much.  We are not sure when we will continue with MC, but we know that we will.

Belle

Anticipation

December 4th arrived right on schedule….the question is did Jnuts get to cum?

As the previous posts have indicated, it has been a very crazy chastity cycle for us.  The last week was especially bad.  Our 17 month old had a stomach flu which had gone through our extended family, so I knew that she was not going to be the only one in the house to come down with it.  The question was when.  Thursday morning I woke up, sicker than I can ever remember  being in my life.  Jnuts had to train new hires that day, and the other supervisor was already scheduled off so he had to go in.  I did what any other self respecting adult does.  I called my Mom.  She took most of the day off and picked up the girls.  I remember telling Jnuts that I hoped he did not get this flu, that I thought it felt worse than 22 hours of labor with no pain meds.  Luckily it only lasted about 8 hours and I was pretty much fine by evening.

Friday Jnuts said he felt fine all day.  No problems, and I began to pack and get the girls ready for me leaving them for the first time ever.  About 10:00 that night he says “I don’t feel good, I am going to bed”.  I stop packing and cooking the food for the party that we were going to the hotel for, make some arrangements for others going to cover what we were responsible for bringing.  Throughout the night he gets up several times, but is not sick.

10:30 Sat morning he decides we are going to go anyways, he appears to be at the back end of the flu without having to suffer through all the nasty stuff.  I run around, scrambling to get myself ready, the food and gifts ready, and the house ready for my MIL to come spend the night.  We were supposed to leave at noon, it was about 1 before we were on the road.  As I dropped the girls off at my Mom’s for a few hours (until MIL could get there) the anxiety of leaving my babies hit me.  I have a little bit of an attachment disorder (ok, more than a little bit) and I cried at the thought of leaving my babies overnight.  I was still so looking forward to it, but still had a little issue.

Jnuts, although he wants to go, is still not feeling well.  He slept a large portion of the way there, and we did discuss whether or not it should the night for his orgasm.  I felt bad that he wasn’t feeling well and didn’t want to “waste it”, and he didn’t want to “top from the bottom”.  Finally we decided to leave it as “what ever happens, happens”.  This is one of the reasons that I do not like to have a set date.  Anything can happen, and my guilt makes postponing it difficult.  As it was Jnuts was out of his device, he had asked to take it off because he felt so sick and the body aches were overwhelming.  We continue to have some minor chafing issues around his balls as well, which thanks to Atone we have realized is an issue with the gap now that the ring is smaller.  Part of the whole day was the fact that we were going to be at a party with a large number of our friends that we only see a few times a year, and none of them know about our chaste life.   We had bought me a Little Miss Keyholder shirt to wear, and he was looking forward to people asking about it in that sick, twisted way.  With him not in his device that was kinda lost.  About 10 minutes before we went down to the party, he decided he felt well enough to wear the device, so that was a big bonus!

By about 11, he was falling asleep at the party, so we headed back to our room.  We excused our selves from the party, and curled up in bed.  At this point he was still locked, and was exhausted.  It was wonderful to be in a room without the girls, but we were both almost asleep.

I began to stroke him a little, playing with the small parts of exposed skin between the bars of the jailbird.  I expected it to relax him a little more and put him to sleep.  I did not bring any of the toys in from the car, and he was still locked.  This is not at all how this big night was supposed to end.  He asked to be unlocked, so that I could play a little more.  As soon as the cage was off, his cock sprung to life.  I knew that he was feeling better, since earlier in the day we did try a little play and there was no reaction at all.  At this very moment I did not want to be a keyholder.  I did not want to control his orgasm.  I wanted my husband to do what he wanted, what he felt up to.  All it took was me telling him it was now on his terms.  He was up and between my legs before I could have changed my mind if I wanted to.  The sex was slow and hard, he knows what it takes to make me cum.  He appeared to edge himself several times this way, having to stop for a second several times to regain his composure.  He then asked me to get on top of him for a few minutes, which I did.  I prefer missionary position, but I can cum easily on top of him, which I did.  I then told him it was his turn, and he took control, hard and fast.  As I whispered in his ear that there was no one in the room and he did not have to be quiet, he came.  The orgasm appeared to be long, but he did not make a sound.   After wards he did say that it wasn’t painful like past ones after being denied.

As we laid there after wards, we both commented that we were glad this cycle was over, and while it didn’t end the way either one of us had envisioned it, it ended in a way that was truly us.

Belle

 

 

Strange cycle

The title of the blog says it all….

First we sent the JB back to MM because it just wasn’t right.  Then I had issues with my BC pills, which finally seem to be settling down.  Then our oldest had the flu, then I got it.  There has very little T&D, and even less playtime.  I feel very bad for Jnuts, and am looking forward to starting the cycle over.  Tomorrow is the set date, and we are supposed to have our hotel night away from the girls (first one ever).  As long as Jnuts doesn’t come down  with the flu we should have a juicy blog when we get home :).

Belle

 

Keyholder anxiety

Well, the big day is fast approaching.  I must admit that I am beginning to feel somewhat anxious that the weekend may not work out as I have it planned.  I think this why I don’t like having a date set for orgasm that Jnuts knows about, but there is no way that we are not going to have sex with orgasm the first night away from our kids ever.  Therefore the date is known by both of us, and although I have promised to make it special, (this is the longest he has gone) I am afraid that it will fizzle out.  Dev and Ab are constantly in the back of my mind, having gone through the same thing with his first release.  I have discussed this growing anxiety with Jnuts, and he assures me that as long as he cums he will be fine.  Yet that doesn’t seem ok to me.  I want it to be special for him, he has gone just over a month, by far the longest without orgasm for him in almost 20 years.

We are seeing the mental effects of not cumming for Jnuts now.  Not sure how much of it is not cumming and how much of  it is the anticipation of knowing that it is this weekend.  The whole “home stretch” idea.  He described it last night as almost feeling claustrophobic.   All I could do was stroke him a little and assure him that it was less than a week.  I think some of the issue may be that he is doing this without a device, as we had to send it back for adjustments.  It is supposed to arrive today, so hopefully it fits better and the rest of the week will be easier, with that physical barrier in place.

Belle

 

Very Thankful for lastnight!

Where to start?  Probably the best place would be the 50% off promo email I got from Ambiance.  I sent it to Belle, and got very excited.  Things that are somewhat appealing become very appealing at 50% off!  Browsing the site got me in a bit of a mood.  🙂

I sent Belle a text asking her if we could fuck that night.  It had been about 2 weeks since I had been inside her and I was getting very antsy.  She told me that we probably could.  🙂

I get home from work and it is business as usual.  Belle is still feeling crappy due to her BC induced period.  Despite what she had said earlier, I figured tonight would be a straight to sleep night.  That is ok.  It is a keyholder’s prerogative right?

When we went to bed, her had went for my cock.  Sweet!  I was going to get some after all.

She asked me what was at the top of my list of things she could get at Ambiance.  I honestly didn’t know.  I want so much!  I did confess that when she had been pregnant with our youngest, and while we were abstaining afterwords, I had really wanted a Fleshlight.  She was quite irritated that I never said anything.  Sorry, but we weren’t as open about things back then.  I told her that I had seen videos of women using them on guys and it really turned me on.  This could also be very cool for denial.  Having a Fleshlight and being locked up and not able to use it would be hell.  Not being able to use my hand is bad enough.

By then her had was going to town on me.  She asked me what I was craving right then.  I told her either her mouth or her pussy.  I was very excited!

“Well you aren’t getting either of those tonight.”

I was shocked.  Hearing this was excruciating…in an awesome way. So now what?  If I can’t have either of those, I need to at least get something right?  I really wanted to make her cum.  It had been so long since I was allowed to touch her because of her bleeding and cramping.  I asked her if I could go down on her.

“No.  I really want it but I’m still bleeding.”

By this point I didn’t care.  I wanted her so fucking bad!  To be totally honest, the fact that I had never eaten a woman out when she was on her period kinda excited me even more.

I convinced her.  The next thing I knew I was kissing her pussy like I never had before.  God I wanted it so bad!  Now it was mine!  I wanted something else.  Something she rarely let me do but loved it when I did.  I slowly wet my finger and slipped it inside her, going right for her g-spot.

She moaned.  I’m golden!  I continued to lick her clit as I fingered her hot, wet, heavenly pussy.  God I wanted to put something else in there.

“Is your cock jealous?”

How did she know?

“Yes!”

“You aren’t allowed.”

I continued to finger-fuck her.  Beggers can’t be choosers, and I was enjoying this immensely.

“What aren’t you allowed to do?”

“Cum.”

“Why not?”

“Because you said I can’t.”

“And I control your orgasms?”

“Yes.”

“I want that cock inside of me.  But you can’t cum.  You better not cum, you understand me?”

“Yes!”

I got between her legs.  She informed me that she doesn’t not know how long this is going to be allowed.  It may only be one thrust.  She gave me the ok.  I entered her.  Oh my God!

“Again.”

I thrust inside her again.

“Again. Keep going until I tell you to stop. I can’t wait to fuck you.”

“You are fucking me.”

“Not the kind of fucking I mean.  I want to pound that ass.  I want to get behind you while you are locked up and make you scream.  I’m going to treat you like the slave you want to be.”

Holy shit.  Where did this come from?  I don’t care, I like it!

“Will you fuck my throat?”

“You better believe it!”

By that point, I couldn’t hold on anymore.  I asked if I could stop for a minute, but she said no.  She came.  I almost did.  I thought I went over the edge, but I didn’t.

Wow!

She rolled over and we talked a little bit before going to sleep.  The highlight of that was her expressing her desire to put me in a humbler and fuck my ass.  Good times.

X rated Christmas list?

Last night, in an attempt to show Jnuts that I was still wanting to continue on our chastity journey,  I told him to use one of the promo codes he had online to buy himself a new toy for me to use on him.   After looking at a few sites he decided that he wasn’t comfortable buying it himself but would rather make a “wish list” and I could pick something from there at my discretion.   We were both in the same room as he was making his list, he was sitting on the couch with his laptop, and I was rocking one of the girls to sleep.  I kept hearing “You are going to think I am so weird” and “I am not sure I should send this”.  Of course I could hardly wait to see this list.

About 45 minutes later he emails it to me, who knew the Stockroom had a wish list!  I was not surprised by most of it.  There were however one or two items that made me look up.  (He of course was standing there staring at me, watching my response.)    Anal play was something that I introduced to Jnuts not to long into our relationship, and I frequently have to remind him of this.  Particularly when he thinks that it is getting to “weird” for me.  Not much in the way of toys makes me uncomfortable, other than hoods and the body bag things.  Toys are ok, but have not been a staple of our sex life.  I see that changing more that we are not focused on his orgasm, and playing with him is more of game.  I will use toys on him much more than I will want him to use them on me, at least at this point.  That is pretty much how it has always been.  I enjoy playing more than being played with.

So now the question is what will fit better in his stocking, a humbler or anal hooks?

Belle

 

December 4, 2010

That is the next time that Jnuts will cum again.

I can say that with confidence due to the fact that we will be alone, without kids, for the first time in 17 months that night.  We are going to a party with friends at a hotel about an hour from home.  My MIL has agreed to stay at our house with the girls overnight, the first time we will have been away from them.

Currently both girls are in our room at home, due to the fact that I had severe fertility issues and we bought a house not expecting to have children.  We both fell in love with this charming farmhouse with a loft and only one real bedroom.  No problem, we only needed 1 bedroom.  Less than 2 months after signing the papers, I was pregnant.  Then after she was born, I was pregnant again 4 months later.  Life has a way to sticking it to you.  We have decided how we are going to remodel the upstairs to give them a room a playroom, now it is just a matter of finances.  It will be done by Spring hopefully.

Anyways, back to Dec. 4th.

Here is the plan.  We have a charity event during the day, and will be checking into the hotel sometime in the late afternoon.  The party is in the banquet room around 6 I believe, which should leave time for some playtime before hand.  The party is a pajama/slumber party theme, so we have to find something appropriate for Jnuts to wear, as he will still be caged at this time.  I already have ordered a Little Miss Keyholder shirt to wear, I doubt any of them will understand.  If they do they won’t know whether or not to take us seriously.   Once we are done socializing (and are most likely pretty drunk), it will be back to the room to uncage and have some more fun, and an orgasm for Jnuts.  Now I am thinking about getting a few new toys as an early Christmas present for him.  Hotel sex is always so much more fun, might as well really take it up a notch!  Preferably ones for teasing while he is caged.  Any suggestions?

Belle

Not quite Vanilla…

Last night started out quite shitty.  I had my laptop hooked to the tv and we were watching Sex in the City 2.  I was just dozing off when Belle asked what happened to the movie.  I looked up at the screen and it had frozen.  Odd…  I went over and tried to get it going again and it was completely unresponsive.  It turns out my hard drive crashed.  That came out of nowhere. 

Now none of you know me personally so I must stress that I live on the internet.  Now luckily, we do have 3 other computers in the house, but my laptop was my primary one (if you don’t count my iPhone which I seem to use more than anything).  I was pissed.  It was one of those moods where it was nobody’s fault, and there was nothing I could do about it,  so there was really no way to even blow off steam.  I ordered  a new hard drive and we watched a different movie(I have decided that being unable to watch the rest of Sex in the City 2 was the silver lining). 

I already knew, due to some comments throughout the evening, that there would be some play time tonight.  We hadn’t really done anything since I believe Monday.  I have been sleeping like the dead for some reason and I’ve been out by the time Belle has gotten to bed. 

When we went to bed, she curled up next to me and started rubbing me.  My bad mood had put me in a weird state.  I needed a way to alleviate the frustration I was feeling.  I was craving pain.  I told Belle this. 

Now typically, I’m not really into pain.  Every once in a while I do want a little, but it is more sensory play than pain play.  When I do crave pain, it usually isn’t about the pain itself, it is about the loss of control (do we see a pattern yet?).  This time was different.  Yes, I wanted loss of control, but I also wanted the pain.  I had adrenaline that needed to escape. 

We hadn’t really played with any of our toys in a really long time with the exception of our pinwheel.  Belle led me to the livingroom with our entire bag-o-sex in her hand.  Hmmmmm…..

She bound my hands with a length of clothesline and had me lie on my back on the floor.  She got our riding crop and started tracing circles around my erect and dripping cock.  We had never really played with the riding crop much and I was not really expecting much time with it.  I was wrong. 

WHAP!

Kneeling above me with my hands tied above my head, she whipped my chest and my thighs until my whole body was warm.  She then told me to get on my hands and knees.  This was totally new.  She got behind me and continued on my ass.  I looked down and saw a long stream of fluid reaching all the way to the floor, creating a small puddle.  She began to stroke me a bit. 

She then pulled the small dildo out of our bag that belongs with our strapon.  She lubed it up a bit and rubbed some lube on my ass.  She also got out our ball gag that we had purchased a couple years ago and used once.  It was put securely in place.  We had not done any ass play for a while either, and now I was dripping again.  Belle slowly inserted the dildo inside of me and proceeded to fuck me with it.  It felt amazing!  After a minute or so, the riding crop was brought back into play.  The combination of the pleasure of the dildo hitting my prostate and the sting of the crop on my ass was sensory overload. 

I was then ordered to lie down on my back again.  Belle lubed up one of my favorite toys….anal beads.  She wasted no time jamming them up my ass.  She was rough and quick about it.  It very much added to the excitement.  She straddled me, still wearing her shirt and panties.  I felt her wet pussy grind against my cock through her panties.  She brought her face up to mine.

“If I fuck you, do you promise not to cum.”

Still gagged, I nodded my head. 

“Good, because you are not allowed to cum.  Only I am allowed to cum.”

She pulled her panties to the side and slid that amazing pussy all the way down the length of her toy.  FUCK!  After a minute of riding, she stopped.  She dismounted me, took of the rest of her clothes and grabbed the riding crop.  She immediately resumed what she had been doing.  The fucking combined with the sting of the crop was electrifying!  All the while, she would bring her face close to mine and taunt me.  Affirming her position, and making sure I agree.  She looked amazing naked weilding that crop!

I had never seen my wife like this.  She has humored me at times in the past, but I could always tell that’s what it was, humoring me.  This was not the same.  She was getting into this.  This was awesome.  This was my Keyholder. 

She took the gag off of me to taunt me some more.  Now I could answer her questions.  It wasn’t long before she came.  It wasn’t one of those explosive orgasms from what I could tell, but it made me envious.  She collapsed on me. 

She asked how I wanted to edge.  With as much stimulation as I had received, I knew my hand was going to be the safest bet.  She gave me some lube and I went to town.  As I stroked myself, she softly rubbed my thighs and my balls.  It took me quite a while because I was being extra cautious.  Edging is always scary the first time because the orgasmic feeling sneaks up on you and you have to be careful not to go too far.  I did eventually get there, and my cock pulsed, being unallowed to release. 

I was then allowed a second go at it.  This time was much more pleasurable and much easier.  I rode the edge for several minutes.  When Belle felt that I had had enough, she gently pulled my hand away from my cock and gave me a couple of final strokes. 

“Lets go to bed.”